Friday, April 1, 2011

Searching Polinas birth family.

I have been in contact with Illich to find Polina's birth family. I know it has been almost 5 months since we had her home but I always knew in my heart that that was the right thing to do. I don't see the point of waiting till she's 16 or older. Lots of things can change,people forget,people die,they move and it will be much harder to find them. Illich is planning a trip to Vladivostok area in October/November . He wants to have at least 3 families or 4 before he travels there.He now lives closer to Moscow so he actually has to take a plane to get there. He already did some research for me. We are so lucky to have a lot of information that it's only a matter of time before we have more information on the birth mom and the family. I just want to do this for Polina. I want to have pictures and letters and to know where she got her talents from and her beautiful red hair. I know that it may not work out in a positive way but at least I am giving it a try and we will never have to wonder "what if". Now that I'm pregnant and I feel the baby kick I know in my heart that this young girl must be thinking about Polina. How can you not. I know what its like not to have money. I am from Poland my self. I was born in a small village . We had no bathrooms but an outhouse. It was a two room 100 year old house that my parents bought. In American standards it would be a shack but to me it was a house. I have never known anything else until now because I live here. I just feel like that could have been me if I didn't have the opportunity to come here. maybe that's why I am less judging of her and her family and maybe that's why this is so important to let her know that Polina is okay and that she made the best decision for herself and for Polina.

Now about Polina. She is a real fire cracker. She is full of life and spunk. She adds more and more words to her vocabulary. She is quite funny when she does the cookie monster impression. she loves to sing the Itsy Bitsy spider in her own little way. she loves to eat and dance. We just love her to pieces. We can't imagine our life with out her we just love her so ,so much. She knows where baby Mia is and points to my belly and says baby or at least sounds like a baby. Sometimes she even points to her own belly. She has learned shapes. Her favorite shape is star.She points it out and says star in the cutest little voice. she is adjusting more and more and says hi to everyone she meets. she is much better with the cats. Before she wanted to pull on their tail and ears now she says nice as she pets them. sometimes when she is feisty she still tries to pull on their legs but she has gotten much better. she is amazing and we are so lucky to have her for a daughter.


Steffen adventures in Russia said...

So nice to hear Polina is doing so well!
We did a birth family search for our son about year after he came home. The outcome was wonderful. Unfortunately we didn't get good news about his mother, but his grandmother and brother spent hours with the woman we hired and we got tons of information and pictures. We plan to keep in contact with his grandmother and brother at least once a year. I am so happy we have this information for Oscar. Good luck!

dgporter said...

I have considered doing this for Aubree, but am concerned about the birth mother finding out too much information about us. I want Aubree to know all she can about her birth family. We don't have much information at all about Aubree's birthmother. Maybe you and I could exchange emails. You could give me some input that might help me make a decision about a search.

Jen said...

1. So glad you're all doiong well.
2. I'm really thinking more and more about finding Natash's birth mom. I'm just, I don't know, afraid of what I'll find? Worried to pick the wrong searcher? I just don't know. Ugh.
3. Natash LOVES the itsy bitsy spider song - she tickles up my arm whenever we talk about the spider climbing up the water spout.

Craig & Kelly said...

I have to agree with Jen and dgporter. We are not so sure we want to do this. Maggie makes very good arguments in favor of doing it. But inside, I guess I am just a bit more pessimistic about the goods versus the bads of it. Part of why we went overseas was so that we could control the situation. To make sure no one ever came looking for our daughter. Must be the defense attorney in me causing me to think this way :).

Plus in our case, the government had no information on Katerina's birth father and minimal (name and false address) on her birth mother. Her birth mother left her at the hospital in our speak and the government in its search could not find her. I suspect there is a decent chance she was not even Russian. So in our case, I think our decision is easier because I truly think we would never find her birth mother even if we wanted to.

I wish Maggie and the Randy the best though in their search. We know they will do what is best with any information they are able to find which is what matters most.

amy said...

Maggie & Randy,
Could you email me when you get a chance? We are also going to use Illich and have him meet CJ's birth family in Vlad in Oct/Nov. I can't wait and am gung ho on possibly having an ongoing relationship, esp. with the birth grandmother and CJ's half sister, and hopefully her birth mother. I am not worried in the least about them knowing about us, but totally understand why others would be concerned.

Wonderful update on Polina ~ she sounds so smart (and of course adorable)!!! I wish we lived closer and the girls could meet :)